Really tempted today... please help/Emily/Rach? Anyone

If there is an issue that you really need to discuss, that you feel needs URGENT attention regarding some type of medical/recovery problem, this is the place for it..

Re: Really tempted today... please help/Emily/Rach? Anyone

Postby dawny38 » Thu Jun 20, 2013 9:29 am

Right! How is it that there are ONLY Total members 1168 here? I have found that to be a very disturbing thought specially knowing how much I've benefited from this site and knowing how many people there are out there that DO want to be clean from Subs, opies, etc., etc. I know what ya mean about the kids getting into their parents oxies and shit. Makes me nervous too especially since I've still got little ones to worry about. Well HELL! If I continue the track I'm on, I really don't have to worry about the kids getting into my stash, because I don't have one anymore. But they could get into someone else's stash and that is a problem. My 19 year old despises anyone who uses drugs and has no compassion for anyone that uses. I brought her up like this I guess. I wish she was a little more compassionate though. This is why I don’t tell her even as a young adult about my ‘problem’. She would probably disown me. She never got into drugs as a young adolescent/teen. I was lucky in that aspect. Going through school, they tell kids: DRUGS ARE BAD, JUST SAY NO!! I have always told my kids that the teachers are going to tell you drugs are bad, and they are but when you’re in the early stages, drugs feel good! They make you feel real good like you can accomplish anything! Than when they have you, they don’t let go. That’s when drugs suck! And you’re using them every day just to not get sick. I’ve told my kids that, because I don’t want them trying them in the first place. I want them to know drugs are all about lies, hurting, feeling good for a minute than ripping your life right out from under you. So yeah kids, drugs DO feel good/in the beginning but then it’s all downhill from there.
I gave my stash/over $500.00 worth of sub strips and pills to my brother on my 20th day, which is also hooked on the shit but when I gave them to him, I also made him aware of this site. He's been texting me lately saying he wants to jump too and have 30 plus days under his belt. He wants me to help him with that, but every time I get serious and I make time to meet or when I want to talk to him about preparing his self mentally, he shy's away or he's busy. Maybe he's just not ready yet? Maybe I'm not ready yet to help another person get clean. Will we feed off each other? I don't know. I hate that he's on subs/I know what he's going through on a daily basis and it fucking blows. I guess it does help talking about the past and being on subs because those familiar ill feelings come back to remind me how awful daily living was on subs. Rambling again, just trying to stay clean.
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Re: Really tempted today... please help/Emily/Rach? Anyone

Postby mynameisDAN82 » Thu Jun 20, 2013 10:42 am

not a real high member count but there are always guests stopping in. The site leaves an impression either way. I lurked here on and off for a year before signing up.

Just be an example for your brother, he will come around when he is ready.

Your doing great! Be proud!
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Re: Really tempted today... please help/Emily/Rach? Anyone

Postby Justjules13 » Thu Jun 20, 2013 11:36 am

Yeah...I wanted to quit for yrs, but got cold feet at the thought of really doing it. I'm sure your brother would rather live opiate free, but doing it is another story!
I was on "another sub site" and got tired of all the pro sub propaganda. It took me a long time to find this place. As I recall it wasn't too easy to find...I just stumbled across it one day.
Even if you fall on your face, you're still moving forward.
Victor Kiam
Pills and IV Morphine- 1985-1999
Methadone maintenance- 1999-May 23,2011 (140mg, tapering to 10 mg)
Suboxone-slow taper to zero, very minimal WD (jump date 12/9/14)
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Re: Really tempted today... please help/Emily/Rach? Anyone

Postby dawny38 » Sun Jul 14, 2013 7:57 am

59 days today. Haven't fallen or cheated. Almost but didn't but I guess that's going to be a forever problem. ALMOST SUCKS! LOL Gets that adrenaline going again. Stupid shit. Anyway been walking ALOT! My girl friend said my 'Spare tire' is flat now. LOL Just checking in. Lots goin on/no time to elaborate. I will though one of these days when I know one of the kids aren't going to sneak up behind me and catch me on this site. I worry most about the 19 year old finding out. Last bit before I close for anyone who thinks they can't do this quitting sub shit, YOU CAN! It IS doable. You just have to get your mind ready for it long before you actually quit. Your mind has got to be strong because boy does quitting knock you down but than you get up and kick it's ass. Dealing with it everyday after is just the aftermath of putting poison in your body for all them years. With each passing day it gets a little bit easier. Some days are killer hard and others easier than the one before it but eventually you end up having more good days than bad. You have to keep fighting for good days no matter how much your mind tells you otherwise. You didn't think you'd get off Scott free did ya?!
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Re: Really tempted today... please help/Emily/Rach? Anyone

Postby cheeps » Sat Feb 10, 2018 1:20 am

And Dawny the fuck are you doing??? Good, bad, or indifferent....check in!
10 yrs on methadone
Meth free 10/08
Back & Neck surgeries
Oxy free 12/06/14
More surgeries 2016-17
2017 Oxy taper halted
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