My liquid taper

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Re: My liquid taper

Postby CatsMeow » Fri Dec 22, 2017 11:28 am

So glad to hear an update my dear Anna Banana! Weed brownies sound soooo great for the Holidays. Only you would think of it. :rofl:

Sending Holiday wishes to you & your family. You've worked so hard to make a lovely Christmas for you & your family. And on such a low dose of sub. You're a true inspiration for me. :cheers-smashed:

I'm dropping faster & feeling pretty darn good. I know you'll be ready to make your next drop after Christmas. Glad Freddy is not in the picture. You're so strong!!!
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Re: My liquid taper

Postby cheeps » Fri Dec 22, 2017 11:49 am

Weed brownies? Yum....I'm making some chocolate candy, those no bake things....bet I could sneak some grind into those. Food for thought!!!
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Re: My liquid taper

Postby Annalo57 » Sat Dec 23, 2017 3:47 pm

So yeah, the Brownies came out amazing. Tasty and quite potent. Big Fun.

I have my Genovese on the stove. Its for tomorrow's dinner but day of rest does it wonders.

Another Christmas, almost in the books.

Santa is on the job. Season's Greetings Everyone.

Anna still on brownies, banana :banana:
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Re: My liquid taper

Postby CatsMeow » Sat Dec 23, 2017 6:57 pm

Hahaha :lol: Anna still on brownies! :crazy: You go girl. Have a great time with that! I was supposed to bake my pecan pie today...but I forgot. :problem: Oh well, I'll make it tomorrow. It would be the first time I've had it hot out of the oven. Possibly a really good thing. :shrug:

Happy Holidays!!!
Dena
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Re: My liquid taper

Postby cheeps » Sat Dec 23, 2017 7:20 pm

CatsMeow wrote:Hahaha :lol: Anna still on brownies! :crazy: You go girl. Have a great time with that! I was supposed to bake my pecan pie today...but I forgot. :problem: Oh well, I'll make it tomorrow. It would be the first time I've had it hot out of the oven. Possibly a really good thing. :shrug:

Happy Holidays!!!
Dena




That thing will be deeeeelicious!! :cheers: :cheers:
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Re: My liquid taper

Postby Annalo57 » Wed Dec 27, 2017 11:13 pm

Well hey there all my lovely SubSux peeps. Christmas is officially in the books and I'm happy to report that I managed everything. I feel like a stuffed goose though. I have not stopped eating pretty much since Thanksgiving. So much good food. This is a yearly problem, but this year I'm already feeling bloated and now I just feel like a cow. So it goes.

I'm feeling pretty stable now on.5mg, so it's time to finally do another drop, now that the hubbub is all over. I'm a bit on the fence about dropping a full .05mg, but I'll give it a go.

I sincerely hope that everyone here had a nice holiday with family and friends or avoiding family and friends. Whatever worked for you to make it pleasant. I have a bunch of threads to catch up on, and I will make my way through in the next couple of days. Its so comforting to know you guys are here, even if there isn't always time/energy/vision for me to get on here. I know you're all here, and that is such a huge advantage to have.

I'm a bit tired. All the hoopla you know. Hubby is in Istanbul, so I will be able to chill for the next week. I'm looking forward to it.

I love you guys. I hope this post finds you all well and happy.

Peace

Anna banana :banana:
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Re: My liquid taper

Postby CatsMeow » Thu Dec 28, 2017 11:00 am

Hey there my Anna Banana! So glad you're back & that the Holidays turned out so great. You're really impressive getting everything done at .5! You're my hero dear. I'm feeling like a fat cow too after all the food & sweets. Gonna have to get a hold of that one too. I know I'll feel better if I do.

Best of luck dropping another .05. You can do it girl. How is your vision? Hope it gives you a break. It's frustrating for sure. It's a problem for me too.

Glad that you can now just chill. You need that now.

Stay in touch & hope you're feeling well today!
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Re: My liquid taper

Postby cheeps » Sat Dec 30, 2017 8:58 pm

Food? The food at the wedding yesterday was to die for....this homemade pretzel crusted macaroni and white cheese ....I wish I had a gallon of it. But...I do have a container full of chocolate buttercream cake and some real cheesecake.

Ok...I have a confession to make. I took several tequila shots for courage before the ceremony and by the time they rolled out dinner I was five sheets to the wind. We had to do the reception introduction and I made it thru that....found my table and proceeded to eat the Mac cheese off my little cousins plate cause I knew I had to have food asap....I snapped some good crowd shots....Samsung works even for drunks. I finally got my plate, put it down and excused myself to the grooms lounge...just in time to :sick: :sick: :sick: :mrgreen: . I managed to get straight for the mother/groom dance, they had dumped my plate...bastards....so I went back to the grooms lounge to chill. There was no way I could dance and no way I could socialize because I couldn't dance. A nice hour nap cured me and I woke up just in time to hear them leave and clean up..... :banghead: :banghead: :rofl: :rofl: but I didn't show my ass and that's all that matters.

I have to find that Mac n cheese recipe though.... :cheers: :cheers:


Anna......05 is very doable....I know you will make it. 8-) 8-)
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Re: My liquid taper

Postby CatsMeow » Sun Dec 31, 2017 10:39 am

Hahaha too funny Cheeps! Only you would snatch mac & cheese off your little cousins plate. :lolno:

Tequila shots? Are you kidding me? That shit makes you crazy. :crazy:

Good job on keeping your shit together though. Weddings are a trip. Thanks for the belly laugh this morning. :rofl:

Hey Anna. We really are a crazy bunch, aren't we? Hope you're feeling well today.
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Re: My liquid taper

Postby Annalo57 » Sun Dec 31, 2017 10:08 pm

Ok, so I'm very upset because i just typed for 45 minutes and when I hit submit it just disappeared. Not sure why.

In short

I was laughing hysterically after Cheeps wedding story. Cat I am definitely with you on this!!!

then I recounted my feeling about Mac and Cheese. Cheeps, did you get a recipe??? Doubtful, good caterers do not share their secrets. I have tried so many recipes but to this day my kids still say Kraft in the box tastes best. I say "of course it does, it's fake cheese."

Fake cheese, fake nails, fake tits, fake ass, fake hair, fake eye color, fake lashes, fake rolex, fake Id, fake jewels, fake....news!!!! And REALITY TV!!!! Fake out!!!! :lol: What a world we live in!!!

So I will share that my husband went to Istanbul for 3 days. Today he was schedule to go to Karachi to see his 97 year old mother. I did not do his plane reservations or anything this time. He wanted to spare me so he had our niece do to. We,l I don't know who royally fucked this shit up, but it sure as hell wasn't me. He went to the Istanbul airport to go to Karachi. He went through I think 3 security check points. The 3rd one looked at his Visa (got it in Sept) and saw that it expired...2 DAYS AGO!!!! Who makes that kind of a mistake????? So now his luggage is on the way to Karachi and he's trying to get a flight home on New Years Eve. What a major clusterfuck!!! I feel so bad for him. He really wanted to see his mother. Not sure if he'll be able to get back any time soon.

But I also feel bad for me. He has a whole week now with no work. My husband does not do well with no work. He cannot sit still. Sitting still makes him extremely grumpy, grouchy, and nasty. He's gonna come home, already pissed, and have nothing to do for a week. This is very bad. I'm screwed. So much for chill week. My rant has now ended.

I will tell you guys that I am the Scrooge of New Years. I don't really do New Years, I'm a Christmas gal. There are deep seeded reasons for my "New Years is a bummer" attitude, but I won't bore you with them. Just know that its a big deal for me to say the following....

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU!!!! May all your hopes for 2018 come to pass.

I love you all. Couldn't be here, feeling pretty good, without all of you. BIG HUGS!!!!!

Anna banana :banana:
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Re: My liquid taper

Postby Annalo57 » Sun Dec 31, 2017 10:33 pm

OMG!!! I forgot to tell you the best news!!!!! My doses ( am & pm ) are small enough now that I don't need the cotton anymore. This calls for a CELEBRATION!!!!!!!!

:cheers: :cheers: :cheers: :cheers: :cheers: :cheers: :cheers: :cheers: :cheers: :cheers:

HAPPY HAPPY NEW YEAR MY FRIENDS!!!!

Acapella
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=haFHrfmfHbc
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Re: My liquid taper

Postby CatsMeow » Mon Jan 01, 2018 10:37 am

Wow Anna, this is great news! No more cotton. Huge congrats on that one. You must be feeling over the moon. You're getting so close & I'm excited for you!

Sorry about the hubs situation. Someone should have caught the fact that his passport was going to expire! Big mistake! Maybe he can go back to work early? That would solve that situation.

I wish for you all the success in 2018 that you've worked so hard for. You deserve it.
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Re: My liquid taper

Postby Annalo57 » Tue Jan 02, 2018 8:20 pm

Just a short update. This is day 6 on .46mg. I didn't do the full .05 drop. I dropped to .23 twice a day. If I'm still feeling ok by the weekend, I'll probably drop a little more. I feel physically pretty ok. Just minor stuff. But the mental rollercoaster is a never ending ride. As a rule, I tend to get a bit blue after the Christmas mania . This year is no exception, but it is exacerbated a bit by the Sub taper mind fuck. So it goes. I will keep you all posted on my next drop.

So after the failed attempt to go visit his 98 year old mother, it took the hubs over 24 hours to get home. He had to wait at the airport for a flight for about 12 hours. He arrived home with a huge smile and and a loud "Happy New Year" yesterday afternoon. He is jet lagged and was up most of the night last night. To this point he's been pretty cheerful for the most part, but i sense his growing restlessness. Tonight he's becoming a tad sullen, but I give him a pass cuz he's trying to stay up long enough to sleep through he night and get back on EST. We will see what tomorrow brings. I'm not gonna sweat his moods. I have my own thank you .

Now I'm going to indulge in one of the Marrons Glace (sugared chestnuts) hubs bought me for Christmas. I love them but they are pricey and you have to go find them at the rare upscale sweet shop, so I only get them once a year. Big treat. We still have a bunch of high calorie foods leftover from the holidays. I kinda wish it was all gone. It will be soon. Glom glom!!!

Hope everyone is feeling good tonight.

Big Love
Anna banana :banana:
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Re: My liquid taper

Postby CatsMeow » Wed Jan 03, 2018 12:59 pm

Thanks for the update Anna. It always amazes me how strong this shit really is. You made a .04 mg drop & it's messing with your head & slight physical issues. This is the reason that we must ALL do a long slow taper to be free of it. You're lighting the path for us all. :idea:

Glad the hubs made it home & hope the jet lag will subside quickly.

Keep these updates coming. Has freddy been messing with you at all? I had a bit of a problem with freddy during the Holidays. But I knew that spiking was not the answer. It was not going to make me feel better... only worse I'm sure. So I kicked freddy to the curb. :spank:
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Re: My liquid taper

Postby Annalo57 » Wed Jan 03, 2018 4:51 pm

Hey Cat. Thanks for the never ending support. It means everything.

As far as Freddy the Fuckface is concerned, I will admit that though I have never had the urge to spike my sub dose, I did have a few instances of "I wish I had some dope" thoughts during the holiday hooplah. But I am always ready for this and it remains a passing thought. I'm not sitting around white knuckling it. The thought comes, I remind myself of where that will lead me, and the thought goes. I think I will always have these thoughts as long as I live, but I've been there and done that and I have no desire to do it again. More than I want anything, I just want to be clean and to be myself, for better or worse. Freddy can blow me.

As always I am hoping you are feeling stable today. I hope everyone is feeling stable today.

Time to go clean the kitchen and start dinner. Personally I'd rather order in but that ain't happening. I told you my week of just being able to chill got the kaibosh(sp) when that Visa expired. <sigh> such is life.

My bestest wishes to everyone here....... yes I am aware that bestest is not a word.

Love
Anna banana :banana:
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Re: My liquid taper

Postby CatsMeow » Wed Jan 03, 2018 5:27 pm

Thanks Anna. I think the reason freddy the fucker whispers in my ear about subs is because I never really got high from the small amount of opy's I was taking for surgical pain. When I was put on 16mg sub it raised my opioid tolerance through the roof. So this sub shit is really all that I know. I only think of pain pills for actual pain (which seems to be getting worse the lower I go). But I've never been tempted to take a pill. The hubs has 100's laying around the house & I know exactly where they are. Don't care. Doesn't matter.

It did frighten me though thinking of spiking. Oh well, I passed this time & I have to believe that I will conquer freddy every time (just as you do).

I do appreciate your perspective. That's why I asked.

Thanks my dear Anna Banana!
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Re: My liquid taper

Postby cheeps » Fri Jan 05, 2018 1:24 am

Oh me, this has been a hell of a week...Freddy has pounded me unmercifully but all I have to do is count my meds and add the doses I write down each day. I keep a strict record of intake. I've had to do so much getting my house and animals ready for this awful weather....and the sheer cold that we are not used to..single digits must be making my back worse :banghead: :banghead: :banghead: :banghead: :gaah: :wtf: :MrT:

Anna, I do hope allyou yanks, Tim, les, John, mz4er, edotz...EVERYONE are ok up there...it seems we sent you this lovely storm....the video of the jersey shore and Boston are just horrible. Having a car flood and then freeze in the water...omfg...that is hellish. I know that folks up north are used to cold and snow but these crazy storms are deadly, scary, and downright evil.

I had the nicest thing happen to me today though. My employer asked me why I was having such a hard time keeping my pipes and house up. After I told him my broken pipe story and how I couldn't get the heat in here above 65, he sent his nephew over here in the raging wind to put plastic up on the weak side of the house. I normally winterize this place in the fall because not all the old windows have been replaced...(this place was built in 1940) but wasn't able to do it this year and my son was busy getting married so he was useless. Anyhow, the heat actually cuts off now instead of running and blowing cold air. I still have space heaters cranked up but I can really tell a difference.

I work for a large closeknit family and their generosity today made me cry. It had to be all of 23 degrees out there in the 0 mph wind and Daniel was thanking me for getting him out of the house because he was bored. I've had people that live Near me offer to help but no one ever showed up!! The kindness was from the heart and now I'm warm.

Now....if they could send a neurosurgeon next..... :banghead: :banghead: :banghead: :banghead: :twisted:


But I do hope that all is well in your world. I made a huge bowl of beef and broccoli, added lentil pasta and an extra bag of broccoli...I eat on,that for days. I hope you have power right on....I lugged out the generator and bought gas....but thankfully, so thankfully did NOT have to use it. I'm getting too fucking old and decrepit for this brutal weather. If the house were right...I'd be ok. I cannot imagine how people live in the upper half of the US or anywhere above or below a certain latitude on this earth. I guess that why so many peeps are moving south in the US.

I had to eat my words to syd about wanting it to snow. I got nailed on hat one! But I lov snow....just not temps below 25-30 degrees. Yep....I'm an old wuss now :ogeez: .

So for today....I told Freddie to suck my sack...problem is...the only chair I can sit in is on the porch....brrrr. So I must go get in bed. :MrT: . :suicide:
10 yrs on methadone
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Back & Neck surgeries
Oxy free 12/06/14
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Re: My liquid taper

Postby suboxalypsenow » Fri Jan 05, 2018 9:42 am

Annalo57 wrote: As far as Freddy the Fuckface is concerned, I will admit that though I have never had the urge to spike my sub dose, I did have a few instances of "I wish I had some dope" thoughts during the holiday hooplah. :banana:


Wow Anna, just go caught up on your story - you're a bauce! doing amazing

I have a friend like yourself, who is never tempted to spike his sub dose, but has been known to wait a day or 2 and then buy and use dope. On the other hand, I'm always thinking of reasons why I can have a little of tomorrow's sub dose now, but I never think about actually using oxy etc

Crazy how the same drugs can affect folks so differently.

Keep on rockin' in the free world
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Was on 24 mg subs from 2007-2010
In 2011 I jumped after a quick wean and it was terrible for 5.5 months!
Got back on subs, was on 24 mg until 2014, then started a sloooow wean:
2015: 10 mg
2016: 4 mg
Dec 2017: 1.7 mg
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Re: My liquid taper

Postby CatsMeow » Fri Jan 05, 2018 12:51 pm

I agree subox, this is a crazy drug. The lower I go, the crazier it seems to get. I guess freddy will always be around in my head for one thing or another. All I have to do is remember my sub taper & that should do the trick. I don't ever want to have to do this again. Really... never never again...

Hope you're well today Anna!
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Re: My liquid taper

Postby cheeps » Tue Jan 09, 2018 4:24 pm

CatsMeow wrote:I agree subox, this is a crazy drug. The lower I go, the crazier it seems to get. I guess freddy will always be around in my head for one thing or another. All I have to do is remember my sub taper & that should do the trick. I don't ever want to have to do this again. Really... never never again...

Hope you're well today Anna!



Used to be here that the only way to remember the sub show was to jump at higher doses and wear diapers for the shitstorm to follow.

Now that we've learned that a taper....any taper is better....I'm pretty fucking sure none of us will forget.


Anna Marie? How art thou? Hope your LI house didn't get pounded in the bomb cyclone. :?:
10 yrs on methadone
Meth free 10/08
Back & Neck surgeries
Oxy free 12/06/14
More surgeries 2016-17
2017 Oxy taper halted
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