Maggie Mays taper thread

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Re: Maggie Mays taper thread

Postby cheeps » Wed Oct 04, 2017 10:58 pm

Mags....I have to give you a moodier song too. This is one of my favs...

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Re: Maggie Mays taper thread

Postby maggiemay » Fri Oct 06, 2017 8:07 pm

Thanks for the song Cheeps! love them, It made me cry, I love music so much and lost all interest init over the years. so I am still at 10 mg, I came home from work and had plans to go to a friends art show. I ended up putting an extra 4 mg in my purse on my way out the door. Because this is what ive always done, if I have to go do anything, I take extra sub. Welllll I am home and the 4mg is still in my purse. I know this sounds so small but having the 4mg still untouched makes me feel like I am starting to respect myself a little again. Tomorrow I am going down to 8.
I wish I didn't feel so damn dull, I am so flat for so long, I cant wait to be able to start putting feelings, expression in what I am saying . till then I really remain so grateful to have found you guys.

I am still dosing 3x daily, I know I know..... not good. I am taking 4mg at wake up at 5-6 am then 4mg at 12-1pm and cant wait to take that other 2 mg at 4pm. I wake up feeling like shitttttt. I am afraid to cut to 1x daily, not sure what approach I should take
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Re: Maggie Mays taper thread

Postby cheeps » Sat Oct 07, 2017 10:10 pm

mags.....much of the shit feeling is too much sub....less is more. You are waaay over fogged! And sub is a mental monster...i promise you, 2mgs will bring your feelings back....it is the sweet spot!

And now that you've proven to yourself that you don't need more....leave that shit at home!!! Test yourself, embrace any weirdness....That is sooo huge for you to not take that 4mgs....

go to dosing every 12 hours....you control it....don't let it control you!
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Re: Maggie Mays taper thread

Postby Annalo57 » Sun Oct 08, 2017 3:04 pm

Maggie, for what it's worth, you can do 2 x a day in heartbeat. It'll be fine. Do that, then worry about lowering your dose any further. I'm learning that it really is tedious, but one thing at a time. I'm in your corner. <3
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Re: Maggie Mays taper thread

Postby cheeps » Wed Oct 11, 2017 9:43 am

Hey mags...hope you are doing well....just checking on you! :popcorn:
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Re: Maggie Mays taper thread

Postby maggiemay » Wed Oct 11, 2017 1:09 pm

Hi Cheeps, Anna
I am ok, have some kinda sinus/ flu thing. I am at 4mg 2x daily since Saturday
Seems like 6am and 3pm is working this week. I know I need to get more serious about this, I know the shit is gonna start to get real below the 8. Right now all I am dealing with is chills and hot sweats a few days after each drop. I need to start Appling the day at time, hour at a time mindset moving forward. I didn't tell my doctor I am tapering at my last appt. On the plus side I didn't run out of my 90 last month and have to buy strips at ten bucks a pop. I have been messing with my own head, surfing through an old message board I was very involved with trying to justify why I NEED to stay on SUB.......But I am still here with you guys!
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Re: Maggie Mays taper thread

Postby Annalo57 » Wed Oct 11, 2017 4:56 pm

Maggie, just wanted to thank you for posting on my thread and wanted to come here and say hi. I hope you're feeling ok today. So you're down to 2 x a day. Thats awesome!!! You can do this. Listen, I am a total freaking coward when it comes to Opiate wds. I have been there and done that in fucking spades and I have no desire to do it again. I have no tolerance for the wds at all. I read of people on here dealing with all kinds of wds and it scares the living shit out of me. But I also hear words from people like me. Words like, "manageable" and "not so bad". So I have hope. The most important part of this process is patience. Take your time, just go in the right direction. I'm here with you.
Anna :banana:
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Re: Maggie Mays taper thread

Postby cheeps » Wed Oct 11, 2017 9:43 pm

Mags....If it wasn't for change, we'd forever be in limbo. What worked yesterday, last week, last year can change....especially how sub affects us mentally.

Peeps can go YEARS being happy on sub. Some never feel it turns on them....lucky them. I know they are out there. Why and how does bupe drive our brain? What makes us feel it differently from others and more importantly why does it take all this time for it to change? So many of these answers are buried in the pages here and there....so many good people have explained the biochemistry. We were blinded by promises when we were desperate.

I mean shit....It's fool's gold and big Pharma's giving out miners rights to Drs Pick, Axe, and Shovel.

Sure...There are those who need a short term intervention to break the cycle...But maintenance? Not anymore. Because the outcomes of long term use are really coming to light....And it's scary and dangerous.

This bupe problem is....at this point.....white collar.....has been since the beginning. Soon...much to big Pharma's dismay, it will be synonymous with methadone....that's why they keep cranking out different delivery methods...keep that patent going...cha ching!

Ahh SHIT....I'm getting carried away. We were sold something that worked pretty well at first but like cigarettes fuck up our lungs, bupe eats our brains.
What is it going to take to get targeted treatment neurologically? The brain can heal....the Neuro peeps have proven it. But treatments are expensive because our insurers won't pay....And so goes the cycle....ad nauseam. So here are some dead horses to beat....right? :lol: :deadhorse: :deadhorse: :deadhorse:


Mags.....once you get to 2-4 mgs....you'll feel a shit ton better....really. It's the sweet spot. Mental clarity comes back for many. The fog lifts and life is brighter. Don't stress going under eight....you'll actually feel much better.
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Re: Maggie Mays taper thread

Postby cheeps » Sat Oct 14, 2017 4:25 pm

Hey Magdalena....how are ya?
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Re: Maggie Mays taper thread

Postby maggiemay » Sun Oct 15, 2017 8:51 am

Good Morning
I don't have any positive updates. I am at 8mg. I am SICK, yuk, I have sinus and upper repertory infection so I have had a miserable week and decided not to drop again until I am done with my antibiotic and over this sinus thing, I haven't slept more then 2hrs a night for over a week because im coughing my brains out.
I actually accidently swallowed 4mg, geez 1st time I have ever done that!! so..... that night I ended up taking another 4mg at 2am, but other then that I am staying at 2x 4mg daily
I will aim for dropping to 6 next Saturday and if I do it sooner ill roll with it.
I know im still at high enough doses to not be going through any serious changes but for me the big thing right now is that when I set my mind to dropping another 2 mg each week is that I don't slide back. This is the bar I have set for myself right now that is really important to me that i stay true to myself with this small step in the right direction.
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Re: Maggie Mays taper thread

Postby nomojo3479 » Tue Oct 17, 2017 6:23 am

Ya I'll second what cheeps said.. personally I feel the best at 2-3 mg per day.. less than that I'm constantly sick and more than that I'm a zombie.
I mean I really hope to taper down to zero eventually
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Re: Maggie Mays taper thread

Postby cheeps » Tue Oct 17, 2017 12:31 pm

It sure is that time of the year for sinus crap...sorry it's got you in its clutches....I think it's GREAT that you are pushing through it....sometimes doing drops when you are sick works out really well though...you're gonna feel shitty anyways so might as well roll it up in one ball.

And YES....not back sliding is HUGE so give yourself big kudos for that girlie!!!!!
10 yrs on methadone
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2017 Oxy taper in progress
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Re: Maggie Mays taper thread

Postby maggiemay » Wed Oct 18, 2017 6:19 pm

Hi Cheeps, ! I actually thought the same thing, drop down while im already sick. I think a part of me is still afraid to come off, Im ok with doing this slowly! I have been on this shit since 2005 or 2006. So yea.... that's where im at right now. I will continue to come here and get the support from you guys, im just sorry I don't have any positive stuff for anyone right now. I will go down to 6mg on Saturday.

NOMO!! glad to see you, ive been checking your thread and was wondering what happened to you. You where the appeal to me when I was looking to get into a group. Its hard to find such long term sub users as ourselves. I have been silently agonizing over thinking I am the only person who has been on so so long. That is great that you stay at 2-3 with hopes to come off someday. Gives me hope. If you don't mind me asking where are you at with your taper? did you change your thread name? Im sorry if I am the reason you stopped posting there, I know I was posting a lot without realizing how the board worked and you may have lost some traffic when I jumped in
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Re: Maggie Mays taper thread

Postby nomojo3479 » Thu Oct 19, 2017 8:15 am

Mags, no no ur all good.,
I'm still at .75 mg per day.. Ive normalized pretty well at this dose. I eat sleep and work just fine.. although it took me months to actually feel ok under 1mg.,
I haven't posted much in my thread cause I haven't had a ton to say. I'm currently 3.5 weeks off of testosterone after a 6 year run on it.. just another thing I was addicted to that I wanted to rid myself of..
it's kinda funny actually.. I have had two intractable addictions that I had over and over failed to regulate or quit (nicotine and testosterone) and because of my taper down on sub I got to a place where it was easier to quit nicotine and test than it was to do another drop on my sub taper.. lol.
So, ya that's where Iam at. I'll be continuing drops on my sub taper shortly. I'm sure I'm in for all sorts of nastyness but for now I'm feeling good.
N I swear if I get thru it im not goin back. I've been fighting off dope sickness in one form or another for the last 20 years.. no mas
So glad to hear u have made it down to 8mg., u have been tapering pretty quickly. U hanging in ok?
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