Looking for advice on when to jump

Sub Sucks and if you havent figured that out yet.. please read a few posts

Re: Looking for advice on when to jump

Postby CheeZeeAnnDee » Sun Apr 23, 2017 5:44 pm

Thanks everybody. Looking forward to normal Cheeps. Subblind, take it easy man...don't make your pain worse.

Mojo, I hear you. I used to think it would be impossible to go 24 hours without dosing, because I was always a split doser. Crazy to think I am off of bupe...sometimes it hits me and I think holy shit, I don't have any of that in my body anymore. :shred:

Eyedotz wrote: Have you noticed any changes on the 'good' side yet? I remember the two steps forward and the one step back shit...it eventually evens out. Have you had any natural high moments yet? Does music sound better? Does the air feel crisper? Soooo many good things will come, my friend...and you've earned every moment!


To be totally honest, I haven't noticed hardly any big changes at all for awhile. Music got suddenly better under 1mg somewhere, and then it became less goose-bumpy but still sounded great, and has remained there. I have had a few natural highs from exercise sometimes, but not always. I feel better than I did at the end of my taper for sure. When I went to the doc to get antibiotics, it felt good to list "none" under medications. I dunnoo...I feel vaguely normal-ish, but like someone who is getting over some shitty disease in a way, like I know I have to keep taking it easy when I start to feel overly exhausted.

Eyedotz wrote:Oh ya. I relapsed on ice cream cake. Bastardly Reese's cake at Dairy Queen....I was trapped!
:lol:
All you have is your fire
And the place you need to reach
Don't you ever tame your demons
But always keep them on a leash

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Re: Looking for advice on when to jump

Postby CheeZeeAnnDee » Thu Apr 27, 2017 6:29 pm

Hello everybody, just updating even though nothing has changed. Still alive. That is all. :MrT: :boobshake:
All you have is your fire
And the place you need to reach
Don't you ever tame your demons
But always keep them on a leash

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Re: Looking for advice on when to jump

Postby cheeps » Sun May 14, 2017 11:18 am

CheeZeeAnnDee wrote:Hello everybody, just updating even though nothing has changed. Still alive. That is all. :MrT: :boobshake:



Well, well....when the cat naps, the mouse comes out to play....disguised as a chicken!!

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Re: Looking for advice on when to jump

Postby cheeps » Sun May 14, 2017 11:19 am

Or a mean green biting machine....

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Re: Looking for advice on when to jump

Postby cheeps » Sun May 14, 2017 11:22 am

Or me....

Image


I have to be honest here....this is one of the very few pics of me that look good. I look like my grandma....and as a kid, I thought she was pretty ugly when she was my age....I wish I looked this good now. This pic is oooolllld. I'm just a wrinkled old granny now.....happy to look like my nanny. :shrug: :mrgreen:
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Re: Looking for advice on when to jump

Postby cheeps » Sun May 14, 2017 11:29 am

Cheeeez...come out, come out, wherever you are!!

Im gonna trash the thread with pix until someone comes along and helps me with a vag picture...watch out!

This is an oldie of my son and my beautiful lee lee. Rip lee lee.

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Re: Looking for advice on when to jump

Postby cheeps » Sun May 14, 2017 11:31 am

Another beautiful chickie....

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Re: Looking for advice on when to jump

Postby cheeps » Sun May 14, 2017 11:33 am

And finally....my wonderful gray birdie....

Image


Who loves to yell at the dogs!! That's some baaaaad shit!
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Re: Looking for advice on when to jump

Postby cheeps » Sun May 14, 2017 11:35 am

Oh, I forgot...here's tiki, the fearless roosie! One hell of a chicken.....

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Re: Looking for advice on when to jump

Postby cheeps » Sun May 14, 2017 11:38 am

Image


One of my puppies meditating.
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Re: Looking for advice on when to jump

Postby CheeZeeAnnDee » Mon May 15, 2017 3:59 pm

Well damn cheeps, never knew you were such a looker. :wiggle: Your boy, and your birds and puppers, are fine looking too!

I have been checking in often but haven't logged in much due to the website fuckery. I saw I was logged in as cheeps a couple weeks ago, and thought about those sweet mod powers she has, and I got the urge to ban myself. :mrgreen: I took the 'good person' route though and just closed out the page. :angel:

Im'a be back here in five days for banana number 2 :MrT:
All you have is your fire
And the place you need to reach
Don't you ever tame your demons
But always keep them on a leash

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Re: Looking for advice on when to jump

Postby Eyedotz » Mon May 15, 2017 7:46 pm

Hi cheez! Yeah the site is completely fuck-o....it's a rare moment that I get a true reflection of thread updates. I've been clicking down the top 10 threads of each category seeing who's doing what. Poor newbs having to deal with the glitchorama...anyway since I finally saw you update I wanted to say hey. I'm a few days shy of 14 months. I'm not 'really' counting anymore....I've saved up my banana stores to pass out to the new peeps. Wow dude... 2 months...pretty cool me says. Are you feeling decent still? Sounds like it. Playing any games? I'm playing prey right now (PS4)... pretty fucking cool but really hard. Ttys pal. I'm glad you're still around.
Eyedotz Spotify playlist (EDM Detox Mix)
https://open.spotify.com/user/eyedotz/p ... luHItCVAiQ
13 Year Sub survivor - Jumped at .03mg after 9 month taper from 4-6mg.
JUMP DATE MARCH 18th, 2016

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Re: Looking for advice on when to jump

Postby cheeps » Mon May 15, 2017 11:29 pm

If someone tells me I look like me avi.....then I'm in trouble.


Be back in dos dias!
10 yrs on methadone
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Oxy free 12/06/14
More surgeries 2016-17
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Re: Looking for advice on when to jump

Postby cheeps » Wed May 17, 2017 10:56 am

CheeZeeAnnDee wrote:Well damn cheeps, never knew you were such a looker. :wiggle: Your boy, and your birds and puppers, are fine looking too!

I have been checking in often but haven't logged in much due to the website fuckery. I saw I was logged in as cheeps a couple weeks ago, and thought about those sweet mod powers she has, and I got the urge to ban myself. :mrgreen: I took the 'good person' route though and just closed out the page. :angel:

Im'a be back here in five days for banana number 2 :MrT:



Hahaha...you be surprised at how many times us mods banned ourselves trying to get used to our new powers back in the day!! :rofl: :rofl: Even tho we are wonky right now....you can't get past the page showing others stuff because you have to login with their PW if you try to go further...and my PM box and stuff are extremely tame and boring :lol:
10 yrs on methadone
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Oxy free 12/06/14
More surgeries 2016-17
2017 Oxy taper in progress
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Re: Looking for advice on when to jump

Postby Eyedotz » Fri May 19, 2017 10:55 pm

For you my friend.... well fucking deserved.

:banana: :banana:

Hard to believe right? This shit is so possible.

:boobshake: :boobshake:

It's 11:58pm on 5/19 here so close enough....almost 5/20.
Eyedotz Spotify playlist (EDM Detox Mix)
https://open.spotify.com/user/eyedotz/p ... luHItCVAiQ
13 Year Sub survivor - Jumped at .03mg after 9 month taper from 4-6mg.
JUMP DATE MARCH 18th, 2016

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Re: Looking for advice on when to jump

Postby cheeps » Sat May 20, 2017 12:42 am

Eyedotz said it....But not all of it....now you are truly on "the otherside".

When I did my methadone detox....I joined a (now defunct board) by that name. It was tiny but it made us close. When the owner, who is an old old timer here, shut it down we all migrated back to SS.....

That term has special meaning for me and I hope it will for you too.

And of course two more hot naners :banana: :banana: :blowme: :mrgreen:
10 yrs on methadone
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Re: Looking for advice on when to jump

Postby CheeZeeAnnDee » Sat May 20, 2017 8:25 am

Right fucking on! Thanks for the bananas guys!
Still feeling better slowly, then I feel like I level out before feeling better again, but in general I am way better than even a few weeks ago. Maybe I'll dip down in mood and energy again, but right now I am just enjoying feeling much more normal than I have in years.

Fucking normal man. It's where it's at guys. And I don't mean normal as in sitcom watching, polo-shirt wearing, vacant-eyed, fake smiling, robo-citizens, I mean our personal normal, where we feel comfortable in our own skin.

It is weird how quickly I can almost forget ever being on that shit, even though I was on it for a bazillion years. I did have a dream where I was traveling and suddenly realized I had tons of half-empty bottles of bupe in my bag that I had forgotten were in there from long ago, and I tried to find a place in the airport to toss them before going through the security gate. Weird dream.

I get tired as fuck in the afternoon, from between 2-5 still, and even if I chug a cup of coffee beforehand, I might still fall asleep and have that weird caffeine-altered sleep feeling where you feel half-awake and can feel your heart beating faster than normal. I never let myself take a nap for more than 20-30 minutes though because I still wake up at night for a bit. Not too bad though, and if I really have to sleep through the night, I can take around a 1/5th of a unisom and it knocks me out. Seems silly that such a tiny amount does it, and may be psychological, but it works.

Other than that I've been reading a fuck ton again and forcing myself to write, finally. And working outside a lot has kept me from playing any good games Eyedotz, but I have a back log of good ones that I am saving up for rainy days and this upcoming winter. I did dust off my old PS3 and got part way through a game I have wanted to try called Heavy Rain. I keep hoping for a spring torrential downpour so I can stay inside and finish it. But until then I have so much work to do around here to fix this place up...it makes me sad to see the evidence of how hobbled I was over the last couple years, and especially during my tapering, in the way I let so many things go. Fuck that was a brutal taper.
All you have is your fire
And the place you need to reach
Don't you ever tame your demons
But always keep them on a leash

Hozier-Arsonist's Lullabye

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Re: Looking for advice on when to jump

Postby Subblind » Sat May 20, 2017 10:34 pm

Your so fucking there CHEEZE...you really did this and you deserve to feel the way you do now.so proud of how far you've come and how little you complained along the way.you(and Dotz and Cheeps and Steph and all the rest of them) are literally fucking SUPER WOMAN!!! You all just get it fucking done...no fucking bullshit...I realized when I watched my wife give birth to my first child what fucking tool boxes men are.we talk the fucking talk but you girls walk the fucking walk...me and most other guys would be crying for our mommies...and you girls just make it happen and keep taking care of everything and everyone around you...happy 2 month anniversary Ms.BADASS...so happy for you :banana: :banana:
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Re: Looking for advice on when to jump

Postby A7dream » Fri May 26, 2017 12:16 am

:D :clap: :clap: :thumbup: :thumbup:

2 months is so awesome!!!! I cant wait to be 2 months, shit 2 days would surprise the hell out of me. Happy for U cheez :D :D
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Re: Looking for advice on when to jump

Postby CheeZeeAnnDee » Fri May 26, 2017 7:32 am

Thanks Subblind! I bet you were a blubbering mess watching your wife give birth, but I bet it was the best experience of your life.

And A7, I used to not be able to imagine going more than a handful of hours without sub...I always split dosed and the thought of going a whole day seemed improbable. In the long scheme, two months is tiny, but when I used to think a day was unimaginable, then fuck yes, it feels good. You'll get there A7. You are plugging right along. Juat keep going.
All you have is your fire
And the place you need to reach
Don't you ever tame your demons
But always keep them on a leash

Hozier-Arsonist's Lullabye

Telling subs to fuck off since March 20, 2017
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