This is my Taper Story - Eyedotz

Sub Sucks and if you havent figured that out yet.. please read a few posts

Re: This is my Taper Story - Eyedotz

Postby CheeZeeAnnDee » Wed Nov 30, 2016 7:24 pm

Hey Eyedotz, did you end up going from 0.14 mg to 0.06 mg in one jump? Kinda curious about how your drop(s) were staged at that low of a dose or if you just hopped down.

Thank ye kindly for bumping this thread. I had read it before but my mind is slipping a bit and for some reason I thought I should be looking for a mega thread of a journal, not this beautiful, concise summary!
I would also be interested in reading the nitty gritty journal details sometime too, if you have a link and don't mind sharing...for some reason it is soothing to read the doubts and hopes of other folks in the day to day of the taper.

You rock for sharing your journey! :shred:
All you have is your fire
And the place you need to reach
Don't you ever tame your demons
But always keep them on a leash

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Re: This is my Taper Story - Eyedotz

Postby Eyedotz » Wed Nov 30, 2016 9:14 pm

My original is on www.heroin-detox.com aka opiate detox recovery. For some reason, I cannot get the site up today...it does that sometimes. I believe I went from .12....10...8....06...03. I could be off a bit though. I know If I could do it over again, I would've jumped at .06 because .03 just prolonged it w/d's. Boy, I hope the site goes back up because I didn't copy and paste that shit on a document at home. It was up last week.....Oh the internet!!!
Eyedotz Spotify playlist (EDM Detox Mix)
https://open.spotify.com/user/eyedotz/p ... luHItCVAiQ
13 Year Sub survivor - Jumped at .03mg after 9 month taper from 4-6mg.
JUMP DATE MARCH 18th, 2016

Forgive yourself for not knowing what you didn't know before you learned it.
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Re: This is my Taper Story - Eyedotz

Postby CheeZeeAnnDee » Tue Dec 06, 2016 2:57 pm

It is back up Eyedotz!
Really cool to be able to read your taper and know how well it turned out!
Thanks for posting the link.
All you have is your fire
And the place you need to reach
Don't you ever tame your demons
But always keep them on a leash

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Re: This is my Taper Story - Eyedotz

Postby Eyedotz » Tue Dec 06, 2016 3:39 pm

YAY! Thanks Cheez... I checked a few times and it was still bunked. Maybe I'll be a smart little eyedotz and COPY and PASTE the damn thing somewhere! It was a lot of info.

It's funny thinking about it now... but the details of my taper are getting fuzzy. For the longest time, I could just remember every increment that I dropped. I guess I can blame it on time away from process. I promise you C, you will have post sub adjustments but you can most certainly live a non-opiate lifestyle, happily! The physical shit I got over pretty quickly....

Peace dudes! ~dottie
Eyedotz Spotify playlist (EDM Detox Mix)
https://open.spotify.com/user/eyedotz/p ... luHItCVAiQ
13 Year Sub survivor - Jumped at .03mg after 9 month taper from 4-6mg.
JUMP DATE MARCH 18th, 2016

Forgive yourself for not knowing what you didn't know before you learned it.
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Re: This is my Taper Story - Eyedotz

Postby cheeps » Wed Dec 07, 2016 1:03 pm

ODR as we call it has always had its share of technical problems. Did you know that ratch was one of the founding fathers and main mods over there back in the day? When he wouldn't pound the big book they kicked him to the curb and SS was born....this is the third SS. The first one had a different name.

I'm sure they have cleaned all his posts up now but for years they used his intellect and input even after they banned him. Most of the old timer peeps here also came from there or from nbbt. Ratch has had far reaching influence in the world of sub detox. He's been the king of "no sub bullshit here" before most peeps ever even heard about buprenorphine. His forums and insistance that sub isn't the fucking miracle of the 21 century have been totally ignored because, of course, experience means nothing, nothing!! Gotta have a clinical trial first.

Whatever....if it wasn't for him....you'd be twiddling your thumbs over on junigs website....if you could stand his bullshit that is.
10 yrs on methadone
Meth free 10/08
Back surgery 5/12/14
Knee surgery 9/19/14
Oxy free 12/06/14
2017 taper in progress
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Re: This is my Taper Story - Eyedotz

Postby CheeZeeAnnDee » Wed Dec 07, 2016 2:52 pm

cheeps wrote:.
....if it wasn't for him....you'd be twiddling your thumbs over on junigs website....if you could stand his bullshit that is.


:o

Bahahaha, no thanks, I think I am allergic to the kool-aid they serve over there...it makes me a little fucking cranky for some reason.

So thank you ratch and cheeps and all you all at Subsux :boobshake:
All you have is your fire
And the place you need to reach
Don't you ever tame your demons
But always keep them on a leash

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Re: This is my Taper Story - Eyedotz

Postby Subblind » Wed Dec 07, 2016 7:55 pm

Those people all have a psyco love affair with Jim Jones(junig)... like watching the fucking step ford wives,holy shit... Nice to see you girls chatting,by the way!!!
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Re: This is my Taper Story - Eyedotz

Postby Eyedotz » Tue Jan 10, 2017 9:02 pm

Bump
Eyedotz Spotify playlist (EDM Detox Mix)
https://open.spotify.com/user/eyedotz/p ... luHItCVAiQ
13 Year Sub survivor - Jumped at .03mg after 9 month taper from 4-6mg.
JUMP DATE MARCH 18th, 2016

Forgive yourself for not knowing what you didn't know before you learned it.
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Re: This is my Taper Story - Eyedotz

Postby The Blind Ass » Mon Jan 16, 2017 11:34 am

Make your own damn kool-aid I say.
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1 Year OFF subs.

Postby Eyedotz » Sat Mar 18, 2017 5:57 pm

Well my fine friends.... As of today, I have been off subs for 1 year. 1 fucking year. On to the next!
That is all. Love, dotz

:blowme:
PS. Fuck you Subs.
Eyedotz Spotify playlist (EDM Detox Mix)
https://open.spotify.com/user/eyedotz/p ... luHItCVAiQ
13 Year Sub survivor - Jumped at .03mg after 9 month taper from 4-6mg.
JUMP DATE MARCH 18th, 2016

Forgive yourself for not knowing what you didn't know before you learned it.
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Re: This is my Taper Story - Eyedotz

Postby CheeZeeAnnDee » Sun Mar 19, 2017 8:19 pm

WooOOOooo!
Nice Eyedotz! Does it seem like a year has passed?
Love to hear about how you would compare your first month off to now. How do you feel?
All you have is your fire
And the place you need to reach
Don't you ever tame your demons
But always keep them on a leash

Hozier-Arsonist's Lullabye

Telling subs to fuck off since March 20, 2017
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Re: This is my Taper Story - Eyedotz

Postby Eyedotz » Sun Mar 19, 2017 9:28 pm

Dude, I feel 'normal' whatever that means....it's a hard thing to describe. Physically I feel good. I have no drug induced lack of energy but I can be lazy (by choice). I have no physical symptoms...I have had very few due to my slow taper, and I suspect the same will happen for you... there will be some I'm sure but I have a feeling you will be all good. Think of jumping as a release from the torture and torment....you will be free CheeZ.

I do, however, have an 'over thinking' problem. At first I thought it was subs/or lack of that caused the influx of constant thoughts, but now I just think it's 'me'. The thought thing is funny because for years my mind was zombified... I was on auto pilot which was an unfortunate way to live for 20+ years. Now I feel like I'm constantly considering options due to various factors when before, I just didn't care. Self-reflection can be a bitch too. This is something I didn't realize I lacked until the paws stage of 3-6 months. I had no fucking clue how brain dead I was until every emotion came crashing down around me. This was by far, the most difficult thing for me....to realize I didn't know who I was. I was new. I am new. I decided I would stop fighting it and roll with the punches...I will be this new me and stop comparing myself to who I thought I was....I am not that person. I am gracious for the opportunity to move forward without orange octagons, and if I have to be different...so be it.

Sleep isn't as great as I'd like it to be but I think it's stress induced. I really don't sleep much...probably 5-6 hours a night and it's hard to fall asleep. I have anxious dreams and I sleep light...again, this is probably just me as a person. I have a fuck load of stress at work sometimes and it spills over into bedtime. I find myself psyching myself out prior to going to bed which makes everything worse. Sometimes I take Motrin and it helps calm me, but I try to only do this when I really need to.

Honestly, I can't compare to the first month... it's a different animal from where I am now. Everything has had phases and transitions into the next step. I think the first 2 months were some the happiest times though.... I felt giddy and newborn. Colors were brighter and everything was great... I laughed harder and I was so fucking proud of myself for the excruciating long and difficult road I traveled. It has been a long journey, that's for sure. It can be done. :boobshake:
Eyedotz Spotify playlist (EDM Detox Mix)
https://open.spotify.com/user/eyedotz/p ... luHItCVAiQ
13 Year Sub survivor - Jumped at .03mg after 9 month taper from 4-6mg.
JUMP DATE MARCH 18th, 2016

Forgive yourself for not knowing what you didn't know before you learned it.
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Re: This is my Taper Story - Eyedotz

Postby Subblind » Mon Mar 20, 2017 5:58 pm

Bravo my friend!!! You are such a role model here,you should glow with pride for how much you changed your existence and what a presence you are to this site.as of late it seems there is only 3-4 people coming here but... there are many who just silently observe and what you have left behind is an incredible blessing for those who have no direction...you really are making a difference and for that we are all grateful.I would send you flowers if I could...and one of those tiaras with the sparkly fake diamonds on it but you would then make fun of me publicly and threaten to kick my ass so...have one of these :kiss: congrats to you!!! :banana: x12
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Re: This is my Taper Story - Eyedotz

Postby Eyedotz » Tue Mar 21, 2017 7:37 pm

Thanks man.... you're a good dude. No need for flowers but I'd love a wooden tiara like honey boo-boo.... yes balls will always be busted. It cannot be helped...seriously, knowing you has been one of the best things that's come out of this forum for me. I always know you're there to listen and you don't mince words which is what makes you an honest to goodness friend. I hope we stay friends for years to come... and I think we will. Thanks again for the kind words...you almost made my estrogen filled eyes water....then I took off my vagina suit. Haha...

Ps...gooooooo cheeezzzzzzzzzz!!!!!
Eyedotz Spotify playlist (EDM Detox Mix)
https://open.spotify.com/user/eyedotz/p ... luHItCVAiQ
13 Year Sub survivor - Jumped at .03mg after 9 month taper from 4-6mg.
JUMP DATE MARCH 18th, 2016

Forgive yourself for not knowing what you didn't know before you learned it.
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Re: This is my Taper Story - Eyedotz

Postby cheeps » Wed Mar 22, 2017 1:45 am

I can't compare to the first month... it's a different animal from where I am now. Everything has had phases and transitions into the next step. I think the first 2 months were some the happiest times though.... I felt giddy and newborn. Colors were brighter and everything was great... I laughed harder and I was so fucking proud of myself for the excruciating long and difficult road I traveled. It has been a long journey, that's for sure. It can be done. :boobshake:


It's funny how this happens to us. It's like it gives us a glimpse of the real person we are before "control" kicks back in. I love this stage. I use the phrase "Fuck you" quite often.

Naners aren't really important now but I love the little fuckers...

:banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana:
10 yrs on methadone
Meth free 10/08
Back surgery 5/12/14
Knee surgery 9/19/14
Oxy free 12/06/14
2017 taper in progress
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Re: This is my Taper Story - Eyedotz

Postby Subblind » Wed Mar 22, 2017 5:03 am

Trying to decide what color shoes to wear with a " Vagina Suit"....and now I'm having all kinds of traumatic visions of Madonna strutting around in a FUR coat for some reason!!!! oooh jeeezzzus
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Re: This is my Taper Story - Eyedotz

Postby Eyedotz » Wed Mar 22, 2017 5:53 am

Dude. That's easy! Vagina colored shoes! Haha... thanks for the naners guys...off to work I goes!!!!

Ps. SB your visions could be of Mariah (although mariah wears a sausage skin)...... At least madonna is a step up......
Eyedotz Spotify playlist (EDM Detox Mix)
https://open.spotify.com/user/eyedotz/p ... luHItCVAiQ
13 Year Sub survivor - Jumped at .03mg after 9 month taper from 4-6mg.
JUMP DATE MARCH 18th, 2016

Forgive yourself for not knowing what you didn't know before you learned it.
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Re: This is my Taper Story - Eyedotz

Postby cheeps » Wed Mar 22, 2017 3:38 pm

Ok...I've got it...shoes that are eastern nc BBQ pork colored....a dusky mauve with light cocoa and pinky wallpaper. Throw on a few crushed red pepper flakes....and that is what matches a vagina suit!
10 yrs on methadone
Meth free 10/08
Back surgery 5/12/14
Knee surgery 9/19/14
Oxy free 12/06/14
2017 taper in progress
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Re: This is my Taper Story - Eyedotz

Postby Subblind » Thu Mar 23, 2017 7:22 am

:o :shock: :o :ogeez:
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Re: This is my Taper Story - Eyedotz

Postby cheeps » Fri Mar 24, 2017 12:26 am

:rofl: ... :lol: ... :mrgreen: :blowme:
10 yrs on methadone
Meth free 10/08
Back surgery 5/12/14
Knee surgery 9/19/14
Oxy free 12/06/14
2017 taper in progress
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