Eyedotz Taper I jumped!

Sub Sucks and if you havent figured that out yet.. please read a few posts

Re: Eyedotz Taper I jumped!

Postby The Blind Ass » Wed Jan 18, 2017 6:21 pm

Holy molly I think I like you. Thats what I am talking about! Your resilience is resplendent! Keep it up champ.
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Re: Eyedotz Taper I jumped!

Postby Subblind » Wed Jan 18, 2017 11:30 pm

:kiss: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :thumbup:
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Re: Eyedotz Taper I jumped!

Postby cheeps » Thu Jan 19, 2017 12:57 am

ImageImageImageImageImageImageImageImageImageImage
10 yrs on methadone
Meth free 10/08
Back surgery 5/12/14
Knee surgery 9/19/14
Oxy free 12/06/14
2017 taper in progress
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Re: Eyedotz Taper I jumped!

Postby Subblind » Sun Jan 22, 2017 9:52 pm

And the Patriots are in the Super Bowl...I hope this made your day my friend!!!
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Re: Eyedotz Taper I jumped!

Postby The Blind Ass » Sun Jan 22, 2017 9:54 pm

I cant even.... PIT WHY :deadhorse:
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11 bananas for me!

Postby Eyedotz » Sat Feb 18, 2017 4:13 pm

:banana: x 11

I guess it's been a while since I've updated my thread. There's nothing like an anniversary to do it, I guess. It's hard to believe I'm almost at a whole fucking year. It has been one of the most memorable years of my life so far. I feel like I was reborn, learned to crawl, learned to sprint and now I'm back to a walking a steady pace. I have made mistakes along the way, but I have learned from them by learning about myself. This is the longest that I can remember that I haven't had any drugs at all (since a kid obv.)...I haven't even vaped weed...not because I'm against it but it just feels like a cool thing to say to myself..."eyedotz, you have been clean and sober...totally. For 'this' long...." I sit here today and close my eyes and I can honestly NOT feel any ill effects of long-term sub. I believe PAWS has been pretty much wrapped up. The ONE thing I do miss about subs is sleeping. I despise the fact that I can't sleep in....ever. The sun comes up and boink...eyedotz are open. Oh, the thought of sleeping till 9am would be heavenly!! At least I can take naps sometimes....usually 20 mins long but they def help.

Anyway, beautiful day up here today...It's funny that 40 degrees feels gorgeous...I walked around the back bay because it was semi-plowed and I could smell the ocean. Gawd, I miss the sun's rays. It really has been tough this winter. I'm in a mode of self-sabotage where I've been avoiding working out...If I can't go outside, I punish myself with yummy treats. Back-asswards I know. Spring IS coming though...It gets dark at 5:30 now instead of 3:45...come on evening sunsets! I'm waiting for you!

Thank you to all my friends that have stuck around and continued to read my story unfold. Love, dotz

PS. Fuck you subs :blowme:
Eyedotz Spotify playlist (EDM Detox Mix)
https://open.spotify.com/user/eyedotz/p ... luHItCVAiQ
13 Year Sub survivor - Jumped at .03mg after 9 month taper from 4-6mg.
JUMP DATE MARCH 18th, 2016

Forgive yourself for not knowing what you didn't know before you learned it.
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Re: Eyedotz Taper I jumped!

Postby CheeZeeAnnDee » Sat Feb 18, 2017 5:24 pm

:cheers: Congratulations Eyedotz! To be honest I needed to read this today. I'm having too many moments where I feel like I am trying to bail out a sinking ship with a teaspoon. Mostly in terms of lack of energy, and seeing how much needs to be done around the house here, and I just feel paralyzed. I started thinking, 'well maybe I Will always feel like this now, and every task will be a huge struggle for ever and ever' and I just want to know that one day it will feel good again to work and get shit done. I used to be such a work horse.

You're in Maine right? Maine sounds fucking gorgeous. I was looking at maybe taking a trip there at some point because I want to see the really rural woodsy parts, and ever since I saw some movie a long time ago, I have wanted to rent a house on one of those small islands there and experience a rainy, foggy week.
All you have is your fire
And the place you need to reach
Don't you ever tame your demons
But always keep them on a leash

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Re: Eyedotz Taper I jumped!

Postby Eyedotz » Sat Feb 18, 2017 7:57 pm

Trust me when I say that you will feel better relatively quickly....it takes a week or so to start feeling 'natural' energy return after doing a long slow taper. We are not mere mortals my friend. The patience and diligence WILL pay off when you finally jump. I honestly think you should try pushing hours and see how you feel. I remember thinking at the end that I'd get a very brief respite from my puny little dose and then I'd be right back to feeling like weakened dried up dog shit again. I'd dose again and it would start all over. It is literal self-torture. My 'mind' kept wanting me to dose because of the mental aspect of 'how low can I go?' but my body was getting pissed off at me.

You've been on this forum long enough to see people come and go. You've seen the post-jump pink cloud float by and dissipate for many of us...There is a lot of healing done in the first couple months but mostly the fact that you can wake up in the morning and NOT fucking think about your stupid fucking dose anymore. Dude you will be fucking totally fine. I have all the faith in the world man.

...and thank you for the congrats. It's weird to count months with bananas but this fucking forum is weird and it is a rite of passage. Yes, I live on the southern coast of Maine outside of Portland. Fucking beautiful this place...when it isn't fucking blizzarding and freezing. Chin up CheeZ...you are almost fucking there. :clap:
Eyedotz Spotify playlist (EDM Detox Mix)
https://open.spotify.com/user/eyedotz/p ... luHItCVAiQ
13 Year Sub survivor - Jumped at .03mg after 9 month taper from 4-6mg.
JUMP DATE MARCH 18th, 2016

Forgive yourself for not knowing what you didn't know before you learned it.
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Re: Eyedotz Taper I jumped!

Postby Subblind » Sat Feb 18, 2017 8:23 pm

Good 11 month anniversary Dotzy. Tomorrows gonna be even better than today kiddo...pretty pathetic that 50degrees is a fucking thing to celebrate but...if your a northerner you'll get it.go treat yourself to some zero nicotine blueberry muffin e juice and a nice little I stick Pico to get your vape groove going...I will walk you through the whole thing...like shrinking down pictures kinda...proud of you dude... Thanks for staying here and being a good humanoid
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Re: Eyedotz Taper I jumped!

Postby The Blind Ass » Sat Feb 18, 2017 9:32 pm

Way to go Eyedotz.
11 months :banana:
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Re: Eyedotz Taper I jumped!

Postby LastAttempt! » Sun Feb 19, 2017 11:22 am

Zero Nicotine??? One thing at a time lol :D

Got this Lemon Pie today, gonna get a big bottle next time in the shop it's tasty as hell! :P

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Got this biatch!!! Free of Dope and back on life since 16/01/17!! :D
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Re: Eyedotz Taper I jumped!

Postby Subblind » Sun Feb 19, 2017 12:43 pm

What mod you running there?is that an Alien.?.?.? I can see your banging it at 100 watts and she's got dual 18650s... eyedotz wouldn't want any nicotine,she wouldn't want any addictive substances in her body because shes...TOTALLY CLEAN and proud of it
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Re: Eyedotz Taper I jumped!

Postby LastAttempt! » Sun Feb 19, 2017 1:04 pm

Fair play could never be totally clean love nicotine, a few beers socially and caffeine too much lol. Maybe quit the nicotine at some point.

It's a Tfv8 tank on a cuboid, to be honest it could do with 120 - 150watts, I updated the firmware on cuboid so it goes to 200w but anything over 100w it starts dropping after a second or so. Needs a 3 battery mod really.

Had the 8 coil heads for it but works better with the 6 coils at 100w.
Got this biatch!!! Free of Dope and back on life since 16/01/17!! :D
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W'aaasssss upppppp?

Postby Eyedotz » Wed Mar 15, 2017 6:13 pm

Hi guys,
I thought I'd pop in and say hello. I know it's been a while. I am in a busy season at work right now and can't seem to find my asshole from my elbow. I guess its opposite of this forum that has been dragging it's ballz on the ground. I stop in everyday and check up. Man this place is fucking Deadzo. I miss talking shit with you guys.

How are all my peeps doing? Cheeps (tapering AGAIN... fucking record for number of tapers in one's life), CheeZ (are you down to .0000001 yet?), Blind ass (where the fuck you been dude?), and last but DEF not least...SB (Fucking guy is some kind of vapo dealer it seems).

So.... I'm not sure who pays attention to dates BUT....I will be one year sub free on 3/18. I cannot believe it has almost been a whole year. It has definitely been a journey of twists and turns. I spent so much time in the past couple years focused on sub, whether it be tapering or post-jump. It's weird to not have to concentrate on it anymore. I don't really think about it anymore. I just live day to day surviving in my boring content life of video games and my ass busting job.

Snow fucking sucks. We got 18" yesterday. I'm fed up with snowblowing and want to get my fat ass back on the trails. I fantasize about summer evenings with the westerly breeze that blows over the field I walk... the beauty of nature in it's raw form. My sunsets.

I hope everyone donates to Ratch for this forum. I did. This place has been a beacon of light for this difficult addiction that I've seemed to beat its ass into remission. My experience would not have been the same without this place and the wonderful people that have come and gone. I'm glad for the people that have stayed and I wish the best for those who have passed along different avenues. I know this forum is quiet sometimes but for now, I am here to stay. I love you guys. ~dotz
Eyedotz Spotify playlist (EDM Detox Mix)
https://open.spotify.com/user/eyedotz/p ... luHItCVAiQ
13 Year Sub survivor - Jumped at .03mg after 9 month taper from 4-6mg.
JUMP DATE MARCH 18th, 2016

Forgive yourself for not knowing what you didn't know before you learned it.
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Re: Eyedotz Taper I jumped!

Postby cheeps » Wed Mar 22, 2017 1:49 am

Get that fat ass out and blow some snow! You live in snow haven. I wish you could come here and cut the damn onions and dandelions!!
10 yrs on methadone
Meth free 10/08
Back surgery 5/12/14
Knee surgery 9/19/14
Oxy free 12/06/14
2017 taper in progress
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Re: Eyedotz Taper I jumped!

Postby Eyedotz » Tue Apr 11, 2017 3:11 pm

Hey guys, I finally have a couple minutes of down-time at work and thought I'd pop in and say hi. Busy season SUX at work and I don't have a lot of time to do anything but work. I've also been working Sunday's trying to get a grip on the following week so yeah, it's been busy. I hope everyone's doing well out there in subland...or my favorite vacation spot, post-subland. It's strange to come here and not really have anything to say regarding the effects of sub on myself...I guess I will continue to be support!

Does anyone here have weird full moon issues? I've been noticing strangeness post-sub that involves a ton of anxiety and insomnia when the moon is full. I had a tough day yesterday with anxiety. It was one of those 'panicky as fuck for nothing' days that turned into a sleepless night... ugg. I don't know, to me it make sense that it's a lunar thing. I don't remember it happening when I was on sub but what the fuck do I know? I was in a zombified sub bliss for 13 years.

I'll talk to you guys soon!

Edit: Oh yeah, I should mention....THANK GAWD spring is finally here! It hit 83 today up here in the state o Maine... I've already walked 24 miles since Sunday. I'm glad my muscle memory is still up and running. Good shit guys. I hope my Northeastern pals are enjoying the sun....finally! Snow is gone! I'm still not pounding ice cream... my ice cream jump date was the same as Cheez's sub date...funny shit. Keep track of it for me, would ya? Peace dudes!
Eyedotz Spotify playlist (EDM Detox Mix)
https://open.spotify.com/user/eyedotz/p ... luHItCVAiQ
13 Year Sub survivor - Jumped at .03mg after 9 month taper from 4-6mg.
JUMP DATE MARCH 18th, 2016

Forgive yourself for not knowing what you didn't know before you learned it.
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Re: Eyedotz Taper I jumped!

Postby CheeZeeAnnDee » Fri Apr 14, 2017 6:02 pm

Bahahaha! Your ice cream jump date! :lol: On my one month anniversary coming up in a few days, I shall eat a bowl to celebrate.

I just wanted to say maybe the full moon thing is hormonal? I don't want to frighten the delicate men-folk with talk of...female hormones :o - but a lot of chicks get anxiety instead of moodiness before they...well shit, I can't think of a euphemism for getting a period...damn it. I wanted a really gory one too. All well, use your imagination here folks.

Where's cheeps, she always has good imagery.

:boobshake:
All you have is your fire
And the place you need to reach
Don't you ever tame your demons
But always keep them on a leash

Hozier-Arsonist's Lullabye

Telling subs to fuck off since March 20, 2017
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Re: Eyedotz Taper I jumped!

Postby Subblind » Fri Apr 14, 2017 10:22 pm

:shock: I'm blushing :shock: :suicide2:
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Re: Eyedotz Taper I jumped!

Postby cheeps » Sat Apr 15, 2017 9:56 am

Subblind wrote::shock: I'm blushing :shock: :suicide2:


You bloody well should mate. The vagina gives as well as receives. I was watching Archie bunker the other day, that show always slays my ass,....Gloria went off on the best period rant I've heard in years!!

Yep, all you guys need to wear an old style Kotex strapped to the body with a weak ribbon of elastic and feel the GUSH of warm tissue crawling down the back of the thigh..... :sick: :gaah: :gaah: it makes a raw nutsack look like a delicate tea party setting. Oh the sweetness, the incredible feeling of freshness and light....not!! :MrT: :MrT: :lol: :suicide:
10 yrs on methadone
Meth free 10/08
Back surgery 5/12/14
Knee surgery 9/19/14
Oxy free 12/06/14
2017 taper in progress
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Re: Eyedotz Taper I jumped!

Postby CheeZeeAnnDee » Sat Apr 15, 2017 6:25 pm

cheeps wrote:
Yep, all you guys need to wear an old style Kotex strapped to the body with a weak ribbon of elastic and feel the GUSH of warm tissue crawling down the back of the thigh.....


Ah, there it is :D I knew I could count on our resident poet, Cheeps.

I want to also take this time to bring up an very (very) unrelated subject...the best Easter treat. The best Easter treat is: the Reese's peanut butter egg. Not only is it the best Easter treat, but it is also a better product than your typical Reese's peanut butter cup. If you don't agree, you are simply wrong. And if anyone out there suggests those marshmallow fluff birds are good for anything other than blowing up in the microwave, then you can come fight me. Those are nasty, nasty.

All most bow down to the Reese's Egg, or perish. :angel:
All you have is your fire
And the place you need to reach
Don't you ever tame your demons
But always keep them on a leash

Hozier-Arsonist's Lullabye

Telling subs to fuck off since March 20, 2017
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