My Story (New Member)

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My Story (New Member)

Postby Ready_For_Change » Thu Aug 18, 2016 10:13 am

A little about myself and what brought me to this website! I finally admitted to myself only yesterday I've been on Suboxne since 2012 after taking the pain pill Vicodin! I started Vicodin for a second time after losing my grandma! I had previously quick with nothing! Now I'm a prisoner to suboxne and have recently decided this is NOT how I want to live my life! I'm prescribed 8mg of sub and have been for the past years taking the whole strip or even 1 and 1/2! Since I've recently decided I want my life back for my husband and two small kids it's not been easy! Before finding this wonderful website, I didn't even know I was tapering! I got stable at 2mg, and yesterday and the day before dropped to 1mg! Yesterday was harder for me! I have sleeping problems as it is but out of me seriquil! My appointment for my meds is today! Last night I took Xanax just to sleep! I'm VERY determined! After I've read such great taper stories I'm more determined! My husband has no clue what my body is going through and even says I'm dramatic! This morning very stupiditly and flat out not paying attention my dumb ass took the 2mg before splitting it! I feel like a failer already and have not even told my husband this morning! Tomorrow I will drop back to 1mg simply cause I wasn't paying attention and didn't come this far to ententionly spike! I've allowed this to control me for too long! Here recently my hair has been falling out BAD, and I have a full head of thick hair!i was so unaware that the subs were doing this to me! I've been smoking a shit ton o weed to help with the unbearable stomach cramps, and diarrhea! Do have a a good taper plan that will once and for all free me of this devil of a drug!? -A
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Re: My Story (New Member)

Postby cheeps » Thu Aug 18, 2016 10:44 am

Hey girlie....I don't know how much sub you have left....you have tapered quickly. When a person gets below 2mgs, it is advised to slow waaay down. You have just gone from 2to 1mg....that's a steep drop.

In order to get you off the shit without having your world explode....I need to know how you have tapered from that 8mg strip....as in how many weeks on 6, 5, 4, 3, or 2mgs. People usually have stack of the shit in their system if they have used higher than 2mgs for long.

Welcome to SS!!
10 yrs on methadone
Meth free 10/08
Back & Neck surgeries
Oxy free 12/06/14
More surgeries 2016-17
2017 Oxy taper in progress
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Re: My Story (New Member)

Postby Ready_For_Change » Thu Aug 18, 2016 2:27 pm

I can and have been stable at 2 mg for a while and after ready a little more I cut my all my strips and tomorrow I plan starting at 1/3 of 1mg, and waiting to stabilize which I believe by 14-16 day I'll stabilize ! I turn plan on dropping again and have marked my calander at September 16 to jump! I'm very committed and I'm not naïve to believe there won't be pain that I just have to suck up and push through! I'm actually at my doctor try to receive comfort meds now! I knew it would be hard but I just told my mom today cause I have school starting for both my kids, I run our family ownned business and I'm going to need help and support for this! My sneezing started two days ago along with diarrhea and lack of appetite! My chills was almost immediately! Do I have a good plane and will it work!
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Re: My Story (New Member)

Postby Ready_For_Change » Thu Aug 18, 2016 3:31 pm

I just left my regular doctor not my sick and twisted strip doctor, and received my regular bipolar meds and my regular seriquil! I'm praying the seriquil helps sleep! She does want me to talk to someone, and get valums for my anxiety over had my whole life! I'm pretty sure they think I'm crazy cuzz I can't quit crying today! I just want to to this and do it right so I can close this chapter of my life! I feel like my husband really doesn't understand how I feel!! I feel he doubts I can do this! I know I can! I want one more baby, I'm only 31 and I never even smoked while I was pregnant! I know I can, I just wish I had more support at home! I had not a clue to what this poison was doing or how strong and bad it really was! The knowledge alone motivates me! Thanks so much for the reply! -A
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Re: My Story (New Member)

Postby Ready_For_Change » Thu Aug 18, 2016 4:25 pm

I just want this to be the end and if Cheeper you have a better taper plan I'm all ears !
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Re: My Story (New Member)

Postby Ready_For_Change » Thu Aug 18, 2016 4:37 pm

I tapered from 8mg to 4mg to 2 mg and stay on all them for a while! Like I stated I didn't even know I was tapering!!!
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Re: My Story (New Member)

Postby cheeps » Fri Aug 19, 2016 4:30 pm

You are going to fast!
10 yrs on methadone
Meth free 10/08
Back & Neck surgeries
Oxy free 12/06/14
More surgeries 2016-17
2017 Oxy taper in progress
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Re: My Story (New Member)

Postby cheeps » Fri Aug 19, 2016 4:35 pm

You need to slow down and only do 25% reductions. So if you are at 2mgs, go to 1.75 for two weeks. I can give you a taper plan but you need to understand that you MUST have patience. If you drop too much too fast you get sick....the same as what you are doing, crying, sweats, chills, the runs, joint aches....all that stuff but worse.

Unless you want to be very very sick and go thru some serious hell, you need to slow down. You have plenty of time for another child!
10 yrs on methadone
Meth free 10/08
Back & Neck surgeries
Oxy free 12/06/14
More surgeries 2016-17
2017 Oxy taper in progress
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Re: My Story (New Member)

Postby Ready_For_Change » Sat Aug 20, 2016 11:31 am

:smart: Thanks so much cheers! I'm finally stable and I would love for you to give me a taper plan! I think my main reason trying to rush off is the judgment I'm receiving from my family! My mother is has ZERO tolerance for anyone but herself! I'm still going to win this!
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Re: My Story (New Member)

Postby Ready_For_Change » Sat Aug 20, 2016 11:50 am

To be honest I'm the type of person to help others out and now I feel helpless!! My world around me as I know it is falling apart! Complete strangers to this poison will NEVER understand it, and instead of them TRYING to read up some , or understand I'm passed off as just another addict with a problem! I never looked su ozone out, I was prescribed it! I never imagined my life like this! Now I'm condimed, and ridiculed for it!!!
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Re: My Story (New Member)

Postby Ready_For_Change » Sat Aug 20, 2016 11:53 am

Cheeper I would love a taper plan from you, cause my body is I hell with the up and down!!
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Re: My Story (New Member)

Postby Ready_For_Change » Sat Aug 20, 2016 12:10 pm

UPDATED: I'm finally stabilizing at .75 , still week and forgetting things! I take two valums a day, my vitamins, Imodium, and my seriquil at night ! I'm really trying, I just want my life back and pick the shattered pieces of my life up! I have to school shop today and trying to mustard up the energy for that!
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Re: My Story (New Member)

Postby Ready_For_Change » Sat Aug 20, 2016 12:56 pm

Today was actually 1.75 milligrams and I showed my husband and even told him hold them! It's tree times as hard when you feel like you have absolutely no help or support! I asked my mother for help yesterday day and told I get what I deserve! I've repeatedly asked them all to do some research on this drug! I'm still finding out things from this poison!!
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Re: My Story (New Member)

Postby tired and desperate » Sun Aug 21, 2016 6:50 am

I have been on my taper plan going on 11 days now a ( 2mg ) I start 1.5mg on Tuesday.. anyway I found yesterday KRANTOM at a head shop where I live and this stuff works like valium and from what I have read it REALLY helps with the withdrawls from everything, just a heads up to let folks know.

it cost about $15 per ounce and I mixed it with orange juice, I actually did NOT have to take a valium last night because of the krantom..... I think it is going to help big time and it is natural.
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Re: My Story (New Member)

Postby cheeps » Sun Aug 21, 2016 10:31 am

Hey tired, I posted in your thread but I'll put it here too. Kratom is addicting and can be very helpful and calming but it can become addicting like opiates. All the meds we take that ease anxiety and pain while tapering we call comfort meds. Comfort meds need to be used very judiciously and its best to wait until you really need them close to jump and after. A heads up!

Ready.....ignore your mother....mine is just the same. Makes me hurt and angry when we have no support in the family but you are here so that's good. You might want to print out some info for your hubby.....your mother is a lost cause right now. It's ok to want to punch her in the nose and give her a black eye. Just come here and vent.

Stay on the 1.75 for at least another seven days....then remind me and I'll send you a taper plan. Basically you are doing 25% drops every ten days. So the next cut takes you to about 1.25. I do round down most of the time but when you get under .75 we go slower and do 20% cuts. The more you can tolerate feeling shitty before you jump, the faster you recover after the jump.

This is the rule of thumb....but....there are exceptions as everyone is different.
10 yrs on methadone
Meth free 10/08
Back & Neck surgeries
Oxy free 12/06/14
More surgeries 2016-17
2017 Oxy taper in progress
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Re: My Story (New Member)

Postby Ready_For_Change » Sun Aug 21, 2016 1:05 pm

I've really been better off with my mom not breathing down my mech! I managed to get out the house and schools shop yesterday, yes it was exhausting ! I needed to that! Today I plan on finishing the rest today cause school is tomorrow! In just about finishing and then shook again ! I know il stay busy Ainu look forward to picking up the priced of my life left! I have neve in my life felt so alone! It's like one little piece would make eve tokay again!! This takes a lot more will power than I relized but this will not defeat me! Strong survive!! -A
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Re: My Story (New Member)

Postby Ready_For_Change » Sun Aug 21, 2016 8:23 pm

Update; Today is day 2 of 1.75 mg and 4 of the whole taper! I've some emotions come up I didn't expect as I'm not very emotional anyway! I believe a lot of my emotions I buried , cause I was numb to suboxne! I have a burning hate for suboxne the more damage I learned it's done to me! I'm very much ready for all of this to be over, but the emotional roller coaster more! I cry over bullshit, and flip the fuck out over stupid things! I never really considered myself a "user" , but yet I knew my body was addicted! Does that even make since! I feel like it's not just my body, but also my brain going through this struggle to get back to ME, the person I used to be! I feel like this is going to have a lot of bumps along the way, but I know it's worth every bit!!
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Re: My Story (New Member)

Postby Ready_For_Change » Sun Aug 21, 2016 8:46 pm

Well I guess anxiety got the best of me I tried running my husband over after a stupid argue and him thinking it was a good idea to walk home! I'm not saying I'm right, but damn it I ain't wrong! I feel like I'm losing my mind!
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Re: My Story (New Member)

Postby Subblind » Sun Aug 21, 2016 9:55 pm

Don't run your husband over...that is NOT the way to gain his support.your gonna end up in jail and you will be going cold turkey if that happens.it blows your surrounded by people who don't understand what your going through...it's usually up to the user ultimately anyway,so you gotta do this for YOU first and they will just have to deal with seeing just how hard it can be...we may be the only support you get,so just keep trying and you will be ok...just refrain from mowing down your husband with your car,you could really fuck up the paint like that
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Re: My Story (New Member)

Postby cheeps » Mon Aug 22, 2016 8:01 am

Sweetie.....you just have to embrace the crappy! The ups and downs are your brain and body trying to find homeostasis. It's something that cannot be avoided. If you expect to be ok in a few months instead of next week, it will help you lower your expectations. You are sick right now....equate it to having mono. It takes time. Read Anne's thread...I think you'll be able to relate....it's long but worth the read.


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10 yrs on methadone
Meth free 10/08
Back & Neck surgeries
Oxy free 12/06/14
More surgeries 2016-17
2017 Oxy taper in progress
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Joined: Wed Jan 26, 2011 1:15 pm

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