Questions about addiction?

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Questions about addiction?

Postby True85 » Wed Apr 02, 2014 9:24 pm

Hello all. I quit suboxone back in May 2012. I have been clean from everything ever since. I hope everyone is doing well. I wanted to ask a few questions to people especially long term quitters about addiction. I went to an outpatient rehab back in 2011 where I was put on Suboxone, and they drilled in my head that addiction is a disease and if you do not go to NA then you will eventually get worse and worse where you will relapse. So probably since December 2012 I have been having these thoughts really prevalent in my mind. I think about drugs everyday and fear that I will relapse. They said I will have a mental obsession with drugs. I do not really think they are cravings. Its like I am paranoid or something. It is really weird. I do not like it, but hey it is better than using. I just wanted to get some people's views on addiction. DO you think it is a disease and if left untreated you will relapse? Do you think some can have a drink again if they were addicted to opiates. SOme reading material or stories would be really great. Its like they fed me all this shit and I belive it to the core. But I will not relapse. how do they know I have a disease with no proof, but whereever you look you see addiction as a disease. I think this hurts people more than helps them. Any advice or input and discussion would be great.
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Re: Questions about addiction?

Postby True85 » Fri Apr 04, 2014 9:16 pm

No thought or ideas?
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Re: Questions about addiction?

Postby Justjules13 » Fri Apr 04, 2014 10:00 pm

Hi true! :wave: nice to see you post.
I've never really bought into the idea that we are diseased. It's not like other diseases. But I'm open to debate. Sure, lots of diseases are caused by external things that we can alter...but not like drugs and alcohol. I don't buy into the "helpless" thing that they preach in AA/NA either..I'm anything but helpless.
I think drugs become part of your personality if you started doing them at a young age. It's a long standing habit. You have to find something to fill that hole in your life that drugs filled. Lots of people make AA/NA their new addiction. I'd rather find one that's more fun. Take up a new sport...learn everything you can about a interesting subject...vollenteer places....something to fill the void.
Life can seem boreing at times...because we aren't all numbed to life anymore ;)
What are you passionate about? Dive into a hobbie with the same gusto that you did drugs..
At some point in the future you might be able to drink in moderation if you've never had a problum with it..but opies are off the table. No dabbling...no chipping...no weekend warrior....no nothing! :MrT: It's too easy to slip back into it. But I would say its a disease...
I never want to go thru physical WD again. I'm done. I'm too old for the bullshit. Im lazy and it was just too hard.
That's what keeps me away from opiates. Fear of physical addiction. It sucks. It tells you what to do and makes you do it. But that little voice does whisper in my ear sometimes...and I get out and walk, or paint, or ride my bike.
I remember when you were here. I'm really proud of you. Do you have non AA/NA counseling? I don't believe you have to spend the rest of your life "in the rooms". There's other meetings...secular meetings. Ones called SMART meetings. You might look and see if there's any in your area. Ive never been to one, so I can't weigh in on it, but they might have a different approach than AA/NA.
Keep up the good work... :cheers:
Even if you fall on your face, you're still moving forward.
Victor Kiam
Pills and IV Morphine- 1985-1999
Methadone maintenance- 1999-May 23,2011 (140mg, tapering to 10 mg)
Suboxone-slow taper to zero, very minimal WD (jump date 12/9/14)
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Re: Questions about addiction?

Postby mynameisDAN82 » Sat Apr 05, 2014 8:21 am

Everything these days "they" label as a disease, it's all propaganda.. Don't buy into the bull shit.. The more diseases they can come up with, the more funding they get to come up with more medications.. Fuck, last I checked its a disease to be fat and lazy lol. Put down the fried chicken, turn off the tv and go for a walk! Its all bull shit! Manipulating society into thinking we are all broken, it's just not true..

The simple fact that you think about drugs everyday, tells me one thing, too much free time.. Get a hobby, like jules suggested :thumbup:
Sub free since 10-20-2012
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Re: Questions about addiction?

Postby syd » Sat Apr 05, 2014 10:25 am

Fucking cults, take advantage of people, who have lost their way. They feed on your fears and weaknesses, to keep you in their clutches.

If you feel you still need some form of recovery program, check out Rational Recovery. They undo, the damage of the 12 steps.

https://rational.org/index.php?id=1
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Re: Questions about addiction?

Postby True85 » Sat Apr 05, 2014 10:49 pm

Thank you guys so much on the reponses. My thoughts are so obsessive, and happen as soon as I wake up in the morning. It is a fucking grind. Just be glad yall minds do not work like mine. I will stay sober though. I do not think I will ever be ok though. My mind is fucked. This sucks. Thanks for hearing me vent. That fucking rehab brain washed me. The system for addiction in this country is so messed up. And they wonder why they have so many overdoses. Everything is about money.
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Re: Questions about addiction?

Postby ExitWounds » Sat Apr 05, 2014 11:16 pm

True, it was very hard for me, I grew up naive and I had the rosy glasses on most of my life. There are good people out there though man, keep your head up. Here is a word of advice the key to stopping the obsessions are simply to accept yourself non judgmentally. That means you must not jump from that thought to some thought about how to fix what you don't like. You must first accept yourself, as is, without prejudice. That can seem hard to do with obsessions swirling around with all of the false positives that come with it. OCD people have a hard time with invasive thoughts, understand that these thoughts are not you. What you keep in your heart is you, our brains are just calculation machines with a little storage.

Now beyond the bat shit crazy ideas we all have, there were be a small amount that resonates with your heart man, that's the shit I want you to listen to and address, not fret over. Good luck man, your story inspired me to start my own here so the best of luck to all of us, I hope I've been at least somewhat helpful, I spent three years reading psych manuals and I want those years back but since I can't have them back I'd like to make use of them from time to time.
Because easy has no meaning.
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Re: Questions about addiction?

Postby ExitWounds » Sat Apr 05, 2014 11:22 pm

Your obsessions basically form a protective barrier around you, they put you into a box. I've read enough of the things you say to understand some. Think about things you used to do which acted as positive feeds to relax your compulsions, my wife catches leaves before they hit the ground around here and I try not to let the boy watch too much of that but I know she's chasing daemons and there isn't anything I can say to help. Understand that our brains are machines, they lie, the prod, they calculate, but the heart does something more powerful, is can discern the truth, and you don't have to believe in god for that to be true.
Because easy has no meaning.
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Re: Questions about addiction?

Postby True85 » Sun Apr 06, 2014 12:13 am

Exitwounds thank you so much for the good words. They really help and make alot of sense. You will be fine if you just try and realize that it is all worth it in the end. You will make it I am not where I want to be and I am struggling right now, but I am way better that I was when I was using. Thanks again and keep trucking and if you need anything please message me. The key I think is honesty and being open for help. Thank you again and I will definitely take your advice into action. I need to get out of my head.
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Re: Questions about addiction?

Postby ExitWounds » Sun Apr 06, 2014 2:30 pm

True stay away from benzos man if they have been around in the last year they might be still making things worse, I've been there too. Thanks for the kind words, I know you are right.
Because easy has no meaning.
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Re: Questions about addiction?

Postby True85 » Sun Apr 06, 2014 10:10 pm

Na man I have not taken anything since May 28 2012. No benzos,opiates, or alcohol. I really only have ever been a big fan of opiates. They were the thing that worked for me. It has been rough, but worth it. Now I just have to get my life together.
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Re: Questions about addiction?

Postby ExitWounds » Mon Apr 07, 2014 4:38 pm

Yeah me too, subs made me enjoy benzos more than anything, hell I don't like sleeping all the time.
Because easy has no meaning.
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Re: Questions about addiction?

Postby Memphis » Sun May 04, 2014 12:01 am

ExitWounds wrote:Your obsessions basically form a protective barrier around you, they put you into a box. I've read enough of the things you say to understand some. Think about things you used to do which acted as positive feeds to relax your compulsions, my wife catches leaves before they hit the ground around here and I try not to let the boy watch too much of that but I know she's chasing daemons and there isn't anything I can say to help. Understand that our brains are machines, they lie, the prod, they calculate, but the heart does something more powerful, is can discern the truth, and you don't have to believe in god for that to be true.


I wish the poster ExitWounds would come back. This is such a helpful and inspiring post
"Hold on to what makes you feel. Don't let go, that's what makes you real" Phillip Phillips
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Re: Questions about addiction?

Postby Justjules13 » Sun May 04, 2014 7:26 am

Me too :cry:
Even if you fall on your face, you're still moving forward.
Victor Kiam
Pills and IV Morphine- 1985-1999
Methadone maintenance- 1999-May 23,2011 (140mg, tapering to 10 mg)
Suboxone-slow taper to zero, very minimal WD (jump date 12/9/14)
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Re: Questions about addiction?

Postby zekemobil » Sun May 04, 2014 10:45 pm

just exit iam done w withdrawal. about 53 day for me. headaches and rls and some nausra are gone .i have real good days but anxiety from along time ago is creeping up. it appears the subs were masking or sedating this prob. i guess you can say i made it. still have to deal w older issues. good luck to you guys. you can do it. allan..
~Zekmobil
65 yr young/male
4 years prescription vicoidin
2 year suboxone
counting the days to freedom from suboxone
clean since 3/12/2014
god bless, lets go get em the bast's
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